(Note to self)
One can only truly believe if accepting the Fardh and Sunnah holistically not simply pick and choose as we want.
The women complain men are selective with Seerah when it comes to taking more wives or when working away from home, the men complain women are selective when it comes to their families.
Our failure is not recognizing that everything should be accepted, that our intentions for marriage be it one or four should be for Allah. Intentions for kids for work for family, friends, charity, travel, divorce, helping the oppressed, everything should be for Allah.
Aisha RA was a jealous woman at times (she said so herself). She was a passionate one and yet she accepted and supported Nabi SAW duties as he did hers. For him, he was spreading the faith, fighting for freedom, travelling across the lands for months on end not being home, his marriages to other women, and his duties to his family and companions. By the same token, he encouraged and supported her in seeking knowledge across all topics, and her family duties and supported her need for the play (innocent and honourably).
The men and women amongst sahabah had their personality clashes and they supported each other's endeavours.
While none of us is at the level of the Muhammad SAW and his companions are we not given the opportunities to reach a fraction of their level by embracing Allah's decree, his allowances instead of working so hard to reject them?
Why does the community reject divorce even in the case of abuse while accepting abuse? Why do people reject polygamy while accepting zina even amongst their children, why do they reject and ridicule a simple woman/ man in hijab but thrive on the fashion of the Kardashians. Why will we accept hiding money from the taxman and embrace bribing the cop while frowning on giving to the beggar on the street? We thrive on going to clubs and working in music, interest-driven business and shame the one who studies and practices deen.
A true believer does not let his emotions cloud his judgment and embraces what Allah makes permissible for he has made it so for a reason even if it's not considered acceptable in his society.
A true believer will listen to his/her creator, and embrace the test. Ego, anger, jealousy, greed, excessive love, hope in people, and the like is our test. Are you to make these your gods? Are you going to let these lead you?
To deprive one of fulfilling her/his duty as set out by Allah comes with its own consequences. Are you prepared to face your creator and say I didn't do it because I was concerned about what another thought?
I didn't allow it because my parents do not approve, I accepted it because my friends did it too? Are you willing to say to Allah I chose the sin because the sunnah was not acceptable to the people? Allah has given the men the responsibility of protectors and maintainers and women their strengths and weakness. He has given women the strength to build and create nations. One is dependent on the other and each is dependent on his brotherhood. So again if the choices worked for the Muslims and believers before, if the Quran and sunnah are your guides how can you reject them?
